My name is Airbud, I'm a dog.
My jaws are strong enough to carry a ten ton log.
I don't lick my ass or eat poop.
I'm in the kitchen making gourmet soup.
Remember when I saved that drowning kid?
I did it because I was hungry, you ever heard of baby back rib?
I can catch a football in my mouth.
And shoot a basketball with my nose.
It's unbelievable how much love I'm getting from these Dalmatian hoes.
I drink and smoke just like any other Golden Retriever gangsta.
Poodles have tried, but they are wuss ass wankstas.
This is the end, I have to go.
I've got an ass to sniff.
You ever heard of J-Lo?!